by Artie Knapp

Short Film
Email: [email protected]

A teenager takes the art of skipping school to an all time low.


A short comedy script


Artie Knapp


(Images of a suburban neigborhood will appear on screen. As the camera pans along a row of houses it stops at a brick house with white shutters. The words 6:30 AM Monday Morning will appear on screen as the brick house is shown in a master shot)

(Interior shot of the house)

Mom – (Getting ready for work – she has rollers in her hair and begins shaking a hair dryer) "This damn thing! "

Daughter – "Mom I told you last week that you need to buy a new hair dryer."

(A loud noise can be heard)

Mom – (Startled) "What was that? "

Daughter – (With a puzzled look on her face) "I don't know."

(Cut to interior shot of Bipper's room)

Bipper – (Laughing – lifts up his leg and lets an enormous fart)

(Cut back to Mom and Daughter)

Mom – "There it is again. (Shaking her head) Hell, I told your Daddy to get that damn furnace fixed.  Do you think he'd listen to me?  Hell no! "

Daughter – (Shakes her head from side to side)

(Cut back to Bipper's room)

Bipper – (Sitting on the edge of his bed talking to himself out loud) "Lets see, we're permitted 7 days off from school every nine weeks. I've used six so far and we start a new next week.  I've got one day left.  It's Monday. (Shaking his head up and down with a big smile on his face) It's time to get sick." (He walks over to his dresser and opens the middle drawer. He lifts up some clothes and reaches for a canteen, and box of crackers. He opens the box of crackers and puts a few in his mouth. He begins chewing the crackers and takes a swig from the canteen. He begins to swish the water and crackers in his mouth and then runs out of the room)

(Cut to Bipper running down the hallway and into the bathroom where he startles his Mom and Sister.  He pushes past them and goes to the comode where he spits out the water and crackers)

Mom –(Horrified) "Bipper! Honey are you okay? "

Bipper – (In a sympathetic tone) "Oh Mom, I've been up all night.  I'm sick."

Mom – "Well I can see that.  Honey you go back to bed.  You're not going to school today." 

Sister – (Gives Bipper a synical look)

Bipper – ( Reluctantly) "Allright Mom!  You better go ahead and call the school."

Mom –(Waving her hand) "I'll do that! You get back to bed and get feeling better. (She kisses his cheek and hugs him) I'll check on you before I go to work.  Do you need anything right now? "

Bipper – "Thanks Mom.  I think I just need to let my stomach settle." (He hugs her and walks out of the room. As he passes his Sister she has the same cynical look on her face as before.)

(Cut to Bipper walking down the hallway back to his room. He walks into his room and closes the door behind him)

Bipper – "That's funny! I feel better already." (He begins to laugh hyserically and jumps into bed)

(Cut to Bipper's Sister abruptly opening his bedroom door)

Sister – "Saltines or Keeblers Bipper?"

Bipper – (Startled by his Sister's entrance) "Saltines!"

Sister – "Mom's never going to catch on to you. (She shakes her head and smiles) You're pathetic Bipper." (She exits the room and closes the door behind her)

Bipper – (Laughs hysterically and lets an enormous fart)



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